Inevitable.

This is now the hard part of my summer. The long awaited college move-in day is now 22 days away. It's time to pack up, it's time to move on. And, my least favorite part. It's time for goodbye.

I didn't realize how hard it would be to move just one mile away from the world I know. The world I love, and the familiar world i've grown up in and where i've grown to be the person I am in. I'm transitioning into the unfamiliar. The world of college. The world of fun and hard work.

I can hardly wait to get going, but i'm never going to be ready to leave. Part of me is still struggling to understand why I'm not having an easy time with this. It's that same part of me that gets hit in the face with a 2x4 every once in a while by God. I call those moments my tough love moments. I'm scared of the transition. But my heart knows that God is with me, and it might be hard, and I might cry, and I'll probably make mistakes and be incredibly homesick and all of that, but I know God is with me. God knows me, and he'll protect me, and he'll allow me to make mistakes, but he still loves me, and he'll drag me back to the path of his love and light.

The moral of the story. Jesus is great. He loves me, even though I make stupid mistakes, and he's not leaving me just because I'm moving away from home. I'm leaving things I love...but I can never leave God, and He'll never ever leave me.

I don't need to shy away from change. Change is inevitable. Changes are good. Changes make me grow. I'm a butterfly who should remember that I'm a beautiful creation of God. He made me to be who I am, and I am his princess. I need to remember, also, that fear is not coming from God. The love of Christ takes away fear. God will protect me from what I don't know. The unknown is the fear I struggle with. Which is a totally selfish and stupid fear. :)

The thing is, I am ready to go in my heart. My head tells me otherwise. Sigh...